


Obtuse

by aworldoffandoms



Category: Open Heart (Visual Novels)
Genre: Angst, Angst and Feels, Emotional Hurt, F/M, Heavy Angst, Hurt, Love, Love Confessions, One Shot, Originally Posted on Tumblr, Tumblr Ask Box Fic, Tumblr Prompt, Unrequited Love
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-05-03
Updated: 2020-05-03
Packaged: 2021-03-01 20:42:09
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,443
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/23983261
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/aworldoffandoms/pseuds/aworldoffandoms
Summary: Nicolette’s fed up with Ethan being so stupid that she gives him some parting final words.
Relationships: Ethan Ramsey/Main Character (Open Heart)
Comments: 4
Kudos: 6





	Obtuse

**Author's Note:**

> Warning: This one hurt me while I was writing it so it's probably going to hurt you too. Hope you enjoy nonetheless. 
> 
> Prompt is in bold.

The air around the two doctors is thick and full of unanswered questions...or maybe that was only visible to Nicolette. All she can do is try and hold herself together against the raw pinching pain that Ethan’s constant pulling away does to her. Sometimes she doesn’t know how to breathe. It steals her breath because she should be expecting it but each time he does it still surprises her and her breath escapes her.

It’s been like this for three months and she has no idea how she has coped this long. She yearns for him to an utmost unhealthy degree. She longs for his touch, his kiss, his gentle words, his resolute strength around her and yet, she has none of it. 

They’ve skirted around each other for so long that now Ethan seems like an enigma to her. She wonders how he can be so resolute in his view of the world, so black and white, so clinical and factual, no room for variations and it infuriates her. 

And yet… 

She won’t have him any other way. She almost wants to laugh because maybe that’s the way when you are deeply in love with someone. You see them for their flaws and everything good and bad in between.

If only a certain stubborn man can see what she felt for him.

“Nicolette?” 

Nicolette inclines her head to the side to indicate that she is listening but she doesn’t verbalise the acknowledgement. She can’t. Her throat is tight as if fingers have taken a vice grip around her neck. 

There is a sigh off to her left and a click of a button and the shades to the diagnostic’s office slide closed. Nicolette jolts and she tears her eyes away from the green fern plant beside the back wall next to Ethan’s enormous desk. 

Ethan gives her a concerned glance, his brow furrows in worry and he steps closer to her, the file resting in his hands limply. 

“Are you alright?” 

_No, I’m not alright. I’m going crazy because you keep pushing me away..._

Nicolette doesn’t answer and she moves her eyes from his piercing blues eyes. Oh, those eyes that could see through her and make her shiver at the same time. 

Ethan’s heart beats a little faster at the apparent absence of mind his colleague was experiencing lately. The said colleague he can’t seem to stop thinking about. 

She’s there from sunrise to sunset. The green moss of her eyes is a current occurrence in his dreams and the phantom ghost of her lips haunt him every day. Why does he do this to himself? Why must he follow his rules that he has so painstakingly upheld for the past thirty-seven years?

Nicolette will certainly be the one to change them...if she has not already. 

He sets down the files and takes his place beside Nicolette, his eyes carefully regard her as if not to scare her. For some reason, she seems more fragile than normal. The light in her eyes is less bright, the ease in her steps before more robotic now and the happiness in her expression falters regularly. 

It’s his fault, he knows it and the thought slices through him again with staggering clarity of feeling.

His voice is gentle as he begins to speak. “I know for a fact that you aren’t okay, Nicolette. What is the matter? You aren’t yourself.” 

Nicolette replies then, however, it’s more a scoff than a decent reply. “Of course I’m not myself. I haven’t been for a while.”

Ethan sighs and sits back against the chair, his arms folding along his broad chest. He takes the plunge and says the answer that both of them were thinking. He might as well say it because Nicolette wasn’t going to. 

“And this is because of me, I presume?” 

Nicolette lets out a dry, humourless laugh. “You think? I’m surprised you are smart enough to realize that, Doctor Ramsey.” 

Ethan’s eyebrows raise at the insult but he decides to ignore it. There are things that are more important than his pride. 

“It’s been known to happen. Can I do anything to help?” 

Nicolette signs despondently, shaking her head. “No, there isn’t anything you can do. Not unless you finally decide to wake up to yourself and save both of us this constant back and forth and unnecessary pain.” 

The room is silent, Ethan processing her words before he says something. “I can’t possibly wake up to something when I don’t know what it is or at least don’t have clues to properly understand it.” 

Nicolette wills herself not to scream, or better yet, cry. She tenses her jaw against the burn in her eyes. She’s not going to break down in front of Ethan. She’ll wait until she gets home and collapses into the comfort of her own bed to do that. 

_How can this man be so infuriatingly obtuse?_

Nicolette’s jaw unhinges as her teeth gnaw against each other in her frustration. She repeats her thoughts out loud because she has to. Are all men this stupid? 

“Okay, I don’t know if you are fucking with me or being deliberately obtuse.” 

Ethan frowns at her sharp words, his mouth turns down in displeasure at her choice of expletive but he replies to her cooly. 

“I don’t think I’m being obtuse...I mean, I just want to understand what has got you all…” 

He searches for the word but he finds none, his hands rest against the table, his fingers threading between his own.

Nicolette’s smile is small, wane and empty. “You want to know why I’m all…” she waves her arms around her head in emphasis. 

Ethan nods and Nicolette turns to him, her green gaze pins him to the spot and Ethan has to suck in a breath to make sure his lungs don’t give out at the intensity of her gaze. 

“ _You_. You have happened. And you will continue to be.” 

Ethan’s sharp intake of breath is all the sound that can be heard in the room and not even the beeping of his pager can distract him from her face or the frankness of Nicolette’s words. 

He finally finds words but they aren’t what he’s looking for. “Me?” 

Nicolette gets up and puts her hands in her white coat, hiding the fact that her hands are trembling, away from Ethan’s searching eyes. “Yes...you. I can’t eat or sleep. You have invaded every part of me. Body and soul. You are the _only_ one for me.” 

Ethan doesn’t know what to say so he keeps quiet as she continues, silencing his pager. It doesn’t escape him that the words out of her mouth were true. The inherent finality and earnestly dripping off them shake him to his core. 

“I… I don’t know what—” 

Nicolette holds up a hand, her face moulding into the professional mask that both of them wear and seeing that makes Ethan's heart squeeze painfully in his chest. 

“Don’t say anything more, Ethan. I’m telling you the truth now because I don’t have the emotional strength or mental stability, even, to deal with your emotional whiplash. I’ve had enough. Either you finally understand what’s happening in there,” she points to his heart and his head, “...or we are done for good because I can’t keep doing this. I can’t keep being in love with someone who’ll probably never reciprocate. What an idiot I am, right?” 

She shakes her head self-deprecatingly and heads for the office door. She needs to leave. She needs to go before she crumbles underneath his gaze. God, those eyes are going to destroy her. 

Ethan stares at her as she retreats from his side and the words fall out before he has a proper way to think them through. 

“You love me?” 

Nicolette stops but doesn’t turn around, however, he does see her nod. 

“Don’t go, Nicolette. We can talk about this.” 

His words plead with her, desperate to get her to stay, to talk, anything to make her stay and not have her walk away from him.

Nicolette’s auburn hair moves with her as she shakes her head vehemently. “No, we’ve talked enough...or lack thereof. I can’t keep torturing myself. Not when I know that you are the only one I want and I can’t have you. **You have always been the one** , Ethan. Why don’t you see it?”

She retreats from the room then, her back straight, her feet carrying her away from him and he has a terrible sinking feeling in the pit of his stomach that he’s lost her for good and that terrifies him.

**Author's Note:**

> Originally posted on Tumblr here:   
> https://www.tumblr.com/dashboard/blog/aworldoffandoms/613740397043351552
> 
> Angst prompt list here:   
> https://hnryycvll.tumblr.com/post/613228742244007936/a-n-g-s-t-prompt-list-ive-never-loved-you-i-told
> 
> Thanks for reading! :)


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